「ダメ親のあなたへ」というある父親の文章が、炎上せずに共感を集めた理由

I see you sitting on park a bench with your iPhone out. Your kid is calling for your attention and it takes three or four times before you recognize that the “Dad” being shouted from the playground is the “Dad” that means you. You look up for a minute from whatever is happening on your screen, wave, and then go back the digital oracle in your lap.

I see you at the supermarket queued up with your kids. The older one wants what appears to be a plastic baby bottle full with liquid sugar. When you say no she starts to cry. You grab her by the arm, pull her ear in close to your mouth, and even though I don’t know what you whisper, I know it is bad because of the look on your kid’s face when she puts the candy back.

I see you at the restaurant. Your youngest has chicken nuggets and macaroni and cheese for what I can only imagine is the fortieth time recently. His cheesy fingers are holding your iPhone and watching what is probably some brainless cartoon you use to babysit your kids because you are too lazy to pay attention to them.

出典：http://www.askyourdadblog.com/2015/07/dear-crappy-parent.html?sf10828937=1&m=1&utm_campaign=co...

Here’s what I don’t see.

I don't see that...

You play with your kid all the time. You spend the evenings after you get home from work reading books and teaching your kid how to read. You take her to the comic book store every Tuesday and let her pick two issues to reward her for her hard work. On weekends you take your kids to a park full of other kids. You want them to be able to play and have fun while you catch up on e-mails on your phone.

I don't see that...

After picking your kids up from daycare you need to swing into the supermarket to grab some chicken and milk before you go home and cook dinner. Last night your kid had a snack when she got home and didn’t eat anything you cooked. Because you two have talked about it, she knows that she doesn’t get a snack, but she asks for the candy anyway. When you pull her in close you remind her of the reason she doesn't get a snack and ask her to put it back. She remembers, looks a little sad, and does.

出典：http://www.askyourdadblog.com/2015/07/dear-crappy-parent.html?sf10828937=1&m=1&utm_campaign=co...

See, that's the thing. I don’t see anything but that one single snap shot out of your life, an iPhone, some chicken nuggets, a spilled soda or an angry face. That's all I see, and for some reason I think I know you. For some reason I think I know what kind of parent you are. You are a "crappy" parent.

And you know what? Depending on which snap shot you see of my life, so am I. I am a crappy parent sometimes too. And I am an awesome parent sometimes, and so are you!


Let’s cut each other some slack. Let’s rest easy in the knowledge that there is much we don’t know about each other. Instead of offering eye-rolls or a frustrated gasps, let’s toss each other a smile and a nod that say “I’ve been there too.” When we’re really struggling, let’s offer to listen and hold our advice back until we’re asked. And most of all, let’s acknowledge that we’re all crappy parents sometimes. We all have our highs and our lows. The rest of the time we’re somewhere in the middle, treading water, and doing the best we can.

Knowing that we’re all in this together makes this Sisterhood of Motherhood, Brotherhood of Fatherhood, Fellowship of Parenthood… whatever you want to call it, great. Knowing we’re not alone makes the lows tolerable, the highs feel better, and the middle a lovely place to be. So please, crappy/awesome/and everything in between parents, let's just calm down a little bit, judge less, and enjoy the ride.

出典：http://www.askyourdadblog.com/2015/07/dear-crappy-parent.html?sf10828937=1&m=1&utm_campaign=co...

Yes, this! Of course there are terrible parents. Of course the one who looks like they're being neglectful may actually be. But by and large, I think that most parents probably are doing their best.I have a short temper, unfortunately. When I tell my little boy to stop doing something, in a gentle way, and he just won't do it, then I get mad. I think it's because I feel so helpless and hurt. Why won't he just listen to me? I love him, I do so much for him, and he'll completely ignore me sometimes. So I snap. If anyone saw me snap, they wouldn't know about the times I sit him in my lap, without him having to ask me, and read story after story after story; they wouldn't know the times I've put down what I was doing and listened to him; they wouldn't know I hug him every night before bed and tell him 'I love you', or that I give him a kiss in the morning before I go to work, even if he's asleep; they wouldn't know how I pray for him. All they see is that one moment when I snap and show my temper, and that's all they think they need to know. They don't realize that when I do it, I myself feel like a terrible person. I hate getting angry, even at the moment I'm doing so.

出典：http://www.askyourdadblog.com/2015/07/dear-crappy-parent.html?sf10828937=1&m=1&utm_campaign=co...